it's heartbreaking when you can feel yourself getting pushed out of someone's life.

motherhood is anything but glamorous. it's 9:30pm. my four and two year old are still up waiting for dinner watching avatar with daddy who's currently fairly bedridden. my ten month old is screaming for mommy. mommy now gets to nurse while going potty for second time today. yay.

Now that we really aren't allowed to hang out with people due to COVID It is clear who was a real friend and who wasn't. I hear from NOBODY and I am lonelier than ever.