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December 14, 2019

stop telling people with anxiety to calm down

Unfortunately anxiety isn't something you can just shut off. If it were so easy I would have shut it down years ago. Sure there are medications that you can take that may or may not help your anxious self calm down but it isn't a cure all. Just like antidepressants.


You aren't magically healed because you are taking a pill. There are SO many things you have to do WHILE taking said pill to make yourself feel the slightest bit better. But at the end of the day you will still have anxiety and that is just how it goes.


A lot of people have experienced that anxious feeling. The walls caving in your chest tightening. You feel like a thousand pounds is on your chest and you cannot escape it. You may or may not hyperventilate and feel INSTANT panic. You feel that impending doom feeling of panic and anxiety blended up nicely for you to stress over for hours. You have to close your eyes and tell yourself to breathe, that it will ALL be okay. You can get through it. Then you feel somewhat better as if you were talked off of a ledge. Then you just wait for it to pop back in like an unexpected family member.


From my own personal experience my anxiety is stemmed from trauma. Sometimes when we experience certain things throughout life it tends to catch up as we get older causing SMALL situations to feel like GIANT situations which leads to that HORRIBLE anxious feeling. Mine is. Mine is stemmed from constantly being bullied in my home growing up. Feeling like I wasn't good enough. Stressed out about my siblings. There was always something adding to my stressful self even as a child. But I bottled it up and as I got older it started seeping out turning into FULL BLOWN anxiety attacks.


I cannot just shut it off. I have heard that before "oh well, just stop being anxious or just calm down". Cool I will get right on that. Thanks for your support and understanding.


Anxiety can pop into your life whenever and however it feels. Car rides, relationships, at work, being alone and hearing a trigger sound, not having full control over a situation. The list goes on and on. Trust me sometimes I feel like it doesn't matter what I am doing that anxious feeling just creeps in and can ruin my day. 


It is what it is though. You cannot hide from your mental health issues. You have to accept them head on and say yep. I have anxiety. I have hot mess anxiety attacks and there is nothing you or even myself can do about it sometimes. I can breathe. Tell myself to calm down. Try to avoid stressful situations that may trigger an attack. But other than that I am stuck with anxiety and feeling stressed out and you just have to love me for who I am. Understand when I have an anxiety attack or if I say "I would prefer if we didn't do XYZ because I have anxiety" that it's not just something "I say". I REALLY DO HAVE ANXIETY. Get over it accept it and accept me and move on.


It isn't going anywhere. But we can learn to manage it.




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