It is really hard being pregnant and for you to be doing fine and then all it takes is that ONE comment, that ONE phrase to just ruin your day. I used to have people comment on my size, weight, SHAPE with every pregnancy and it was REALLY hard on me. As if growing a human isn't enough we have to worry about what other people are going to say to us when growing SAID HUMAN. IF I could give ONE piece of advice it is just to not say anything AT ALL even if you want to because you just don't know what might trigger something with someone. BUT here are a few things that I feel like I SHOULDN'T have to tell people, but have to anyways.
1. STOP COMPARING YOUR BIRTH STORIES TO OTHER PEOPLE. Your experience is not going to be the SAME for every single person and their experience will not be like yours!
* It is really hard when you are trying to help a pregnant person and they are super scared because someone had put it in their head that this that or this might or will go wrong. ALL bodies are different ALL babies are different which means yes, ALL experiences will be DIFFERENT. Over the years things have changed drastically when it comes to childbirth and labor and delivery and it is important to remember that nothing is the same as it was 40 years ago. Or even 10 years ago. Try to keep your experiences, NEGATIVE stories or scary/gross stories to yourself even if you feel that it might be helpful. When you get into someones head they will feel negative about certain issues or might feel a complex and you don't want that. We want happy positive people having babies, so try to be super uplifting.
2. YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY HUGE ARE YOU SURE THERE ISN'T MORE THAN ONE IN THERE? Just no. Stop assuming anything and stop pointing out other people's bodies. It is really weird to make a comment toward someone's body in general let alone question how many babies are inside of someone's body because they don't look big enough or small enough. Once a lady asked if I was having twins she said I was huge. I said are you? she walked away. Just don't.
3. Are you going to breastfeed? IF YOU DON'T you are depriving your baby of nutrition.
First off. No. Second of all you should support that person no matter what they choose for their baby and themselves. Not everyone is in a position to nurse and not everyone is in a position to be home with baby for too long ect. EVERY PERSON is different. You could always CHANGE the wording to "what are your plans for feeding how can I support you through that".
4. Are you sure you should be eating that?! LEAVE PEOPLE ALONE. Pregnant or not let them eat what they want. What harm does it cause you when they eat something? When you are expecting a baby eat healthy but also eat what you want as well! Enjoy your pregnancy!
5. This one is more of "DO NOT TOUCH PREGNANT PEOPLE"
It really is weird. I know you might think it is sweet to feel a baby kicking but I barely liked when my husband touched my kicking baby let alone a random person at the grocery store. How would you feel if someone came up and just started rubbing your stomach. PREGNANT or not. Yeah let's just stop doing that. Not only that it is really invasive and just weird to touch other people in general so don't go up and rub someone's stomach.
So all in all. Just kinda mind your own business EVEN if you feel your intentions are good! Everyone is going to have a different birth, experience and pregnancy journey. If someone wants to open up about their journey then great! If someone wants to ask you a personal question that is great too! But remember to choose your words wisely just as if you were talking to someone who WASN'T expecting.
sometimes i dream of divorce just to have alone time.
my kids are dicks sometimes. I’m a dick sometimes. So in other words we are all dicks being dicks to each other.
i need help! i cannot do it all on my own and still be pleasant and bubbly.